She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
