we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
