So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
