Midget sex pt 2 tonight
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
