Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
