I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Randomize
