Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
no you cant smoke seaweed
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I want to fling myself into the sun
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
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