HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
