Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Randomize
