Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize
