May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Houston, we have a blender
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
