can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
we're so committed to being not committed
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Randomize