Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
