Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Don't EVER smell your tampon
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
