Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
