Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
