I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize