Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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