did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
