Little spoons don't ask big questions
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
