I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
this will be a night to untag.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
