now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Randomize
