talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Randomize