heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
