Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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