im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
