chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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