Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Randomize
