Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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