I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
