And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
