She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize
