I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize
