He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
My feet surprised me
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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