I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
