how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
