I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
