Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
