btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
