I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
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