my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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