haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
