u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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