the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ๐๐#pensacolaproblems
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my manโs dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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