Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Randomize
