Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
