no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I intend to get homeless drunk
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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