Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
