YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
