someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
